Conversations with the kids...

Collin

**While I was doing the dishes, Collin walked up to me and out of nowhere confided, "Mom, I'm going to tell you something I've never told anyone. (My curiosity obviously piqued, he cautiously continued...) The boys on the playground at school always say, 'Ewww, yuck, Frozen is stupid' and so I say the same thing. But, Mom, I actually like Frozen. But I don't want to say so. (Then finished very seriously...) Mom, I've never told anyone that before."



**One afternoon, Collin approached me with a look of disgust and said, "Mom, what happens if you see someone's private parts that you DON'T want to see??"

Trying to calm the alarms going off in my head, I casually said, "Oh. Has that happened to you before?"

He exclaimed, "Yeah. Because people at school bend forward (as he leans forward to demonstrate, and then indicates his backside where some crack must be exposed) and that's when it shows. (Still, very obviously disgusted.) "Mom. It happens quite often."



**Collin- very wistfully with a sigh, lamented, "I miss the way things used to be."
Me- glancing side to side like, what in the world- but with curiosity I asked, "What do you mean?"
Collin- "Ohhhh. You know, just when Lane's foot wasn't broken." 
(Shelley had run over Lane's foot and he was on crutches for like a week. I guess this was rough for Collin)


**Being so concerned about getting married and who is he going to marry..
Collin- Do you have to get married if you're Mormon?
Me- (thinking of all the eternal reasons and over complicating things, stammered) Welllll, technically, yes.
Collin- What if you don't want to?!
Me- I think you'll probably want to.
Collin- (Completely exasperated and on the edge of crying) How am I going to find a Mormon girl?!!!
(This went on... and has repeatedly gone on... for a long time now. He seems confused at how he'll even be able to figure out a girl is Mormon. Like he'll get married and then suddenly find out she's NOT Mormon and be mortified that he made a mistake. He wishes he could marry Lilly but she won't agree to marry him. If he meets a new girl, he'll mention to me that he wonders if she'll marry him. It's looks exhausting.)


**One night in the bathtub I was getting after Collin for touching his private parts.
"Stop touching it please," I said.
"Why!" he argued, with an impish grin. "I like to!!" As he squishes it again. "I like to pretend it's an old Grandpa!"

Whaaa??!!! I can't make this stuff up



**When we were packing to move, I had the boys clean out their "junk drawers". Collin was taking too long and it was time to bed so I was making him stop. He got really agitated and finally told me, "But Mom, I feel like something bad is going to happen if I leave it unorganized!" 
(Is this a red flag of some sort?!)



**The boys were eating raspberries and Collin wanted to know if they would stain his shirt. I said yes, but if it's a dark shirt it probably wouldn't show. Then Collin shouted, "But it would stain your mama's bra!!" Then busted up into hysterical, raucous laughter like he'd said the funniest thing in the world. I was shocked and mortified and scolded him sternly! Then asked him where he heard such a thing! "Sandlot", he replied, with the most confused look on his face over getting in trouble. (I knew that movie was going to come back and bite me!) Then he asked, "What's a bra?" (Oh heavens!)

Weston

**"Mom! Watch me flute!!" (As he proceeds to whistle)

**We were at Collin's soccer practice and Weston was running around, chasing a ball. Out of nowhere, he runs up to me and announces, "Mom. I like the beach house better."
(It was about two weeks after we'd gotten home from California. Apparently he was internally sizing up the pros and cons between there and Gallup and had finally come to a conclusion. I was dying. Yes, son, I do think the beach house wins.)


** Watching "Pan" in the theaters with Weston, there was a fight scene that broke out and the girl fairy kicked Hook or something. Weston's jaw dropped and he looked at me with big eyes and attitude in his voice and said, "Okayyyy... That wasn't very nice! She just kicked him in the FACE!"


**Having Scarlett at our house for a few hours, Weston played with her constantly and had to be near her the entire time. He finally sat back on the couch, watching her play on her stomach when he offhandedly said, "Maybe when she's one she'll crawl." Feeling like he would like a response, I muttered, "Yeah, maybe." Seeming encouraged by adult participation he smacked his lips, sighed and with what seemed mature perspective, stated, "Yeah. Ya just never know."


**Weston got a brand new, red bike right after we moved to Gilbert. Travis had taken him to Wal-Mart to pick it out. He said that when they were taking the bike out to the car Weston was bursting with admiration and proclaimed, "My bike. is a masterpiece."


**Whenever the boys see a policeman on the street they love to shout and point it out, always exclaiming, "Ohhhh, he's going to COP them!!!" And they frequently warn me about speeding. "Mom, you don't wanna get COPPED!" It makes me chuckle every time.