Goodbye House

Well, as you can imagine, that last post was more than emotionally draining, so I was totally procrastinating this next one! But I can't  keep getting behind, so here it goes...

After saying goodbye to the Shaws and crying our way home, it was time to get serious about OUR departure! Everything but the {leftovers} was packed in the truck, but I seriously underestimated how much time it would take to get those {leftovers} out of here! i.e. mattresses, overnight bags, toiletries, and all those odds and ends that hang around until the last minute. Plus, I still had to make a run to the dollar store to get busy work for Collin and Weston on the plane. Paula and Carrie also made a run to Wal-Mart to get Collin's new Spiderman backpack to take on the plane, and then they swung by Wegmans for one last sub! 

Do you like our eating arrangements?! We seriously had nothing left in the house. 

If I remember right, their plane left at 4pm, so around 2:30pm we loaded everyone up in the car to go to the airport.

Our moving plans changed several times before we finally asked Paula and Carrie if they wouldn't mind flying the boys back to Arizona with them, while we drove our car. (Originally, we were going to be driving a moving truck, with our car on the back, but thankfully I talked Trav out of that one! I was sooo not looking forward to driving that monstrosity across the country.) We also contemplated just taking the boys with us on the drive, but after a few bad experiences going not a 1/20th that far, we figured we'd probably be driving our car off a cliff by the time we ever made it to AZ with all of 4 of us together that long. SO, Paula and Carrie to the rescue!

I need to add also, that they were an ENORMOUS help through the whole moving process. I really, truly don't know how we could have done this without them. They kept saying that they didn't feel like they did much, but they really did. Especially the day we packed the truck. It was so nice not having to worry about where the boys were. They played with them, took them on walks, and entertained them many, many hours over the week they were here. Not to mention, they braved a 5 hour plane ride with them! We were so grateful. Words can't describe what a blessing it was to have their help. Thank you!!!

Collin had a hard time separating from us at security. It took a lot of bribing to get him to walk away! I had been anxious for this moment ever since we decided to do it this way. I've never (seriously, NEVER) been separated from either boys longer than a day and night. My heart ached every time I thought of being away from them that long, and I was even more worried they would be traumatized by it, missing their mom and dad. Well, wonder of wonders, they did fine. And even more shocking to me... so did I. (In fact, I kinda enjoyed it). But more on that later!

Back to the task at hand. After dropping them off, we ran a few errands, like driving to north campus to drop off Trav's graduation gown and hood, stopping in at HSBC to close our banking account (which was funny, because the lady that helped us said she had just helped another couple close their accounts yesterday... turns out, it was the Shaws!), and going to Target for some more video camera tapes and Dramamine. Then it was back home to vacuum, mop the kitchen floor, clean the bathrooms, shower and leave. By now, it was after 7pm. 

With the car loaded up, there was nothing left to do, but walk once more through our incredibly, empty house.

I know I'm a sentimental person, but this was even harder to do than I imagined. As I walked from room to room, I kept picturing all the events that took place here. It was like I could see us walking in and out, changing diapers, blowing out birthday candles, cooking spaghetti, watching a sleeping baby. All the special moments... but also the day to day routines. 

All the dinners and all the visitors. All the parties and all the friends. All the seasons and all the holidays. From walking in that back, snow covered door with our first baby, to walking out in the sun with two, sweet boys. So many memories! You never realize how much can happen in four years. This was where we started our family! Our first home, together with our boys.

Walking into this room was by far the most emotional. I looked at those vinyl words, and immediately broke down. (Much like I am now!) It felt so empty without the crib and toddler bed. Never to be again! The feelings I had in this room, were almost too much for me to handle. From the moment we moved in, this was to be the nursery. Collin and Weston will most likely never remember this room, but I can never forget it.

February 2008.... proud, first time home buyers!

Saying goodbye... 2012

Can you believe we got all our belongings to squeeze into 17 ft.?? We had some pretty good packers. :)

Getting ready to go, our good neighbor, Celeste was sitting on her front step watching it all. I had to pull her over for a picture. I know she looks like she hates us... but she really doesn't! :) She and her family have been great friends to us. Her twins were our boys' first babysitters. She was always there for a cup of milk or egg, and vice versa. We spent many hours on our driveways, talking. Her son and husband jimmied my car door when I locked Collin in the car! It's so comforting, knowing you can trust the people that live next door to you. 

Then, she was so funny and hauled all her kids out of the house for a picture together. Her husband, Ernest, must have been out. We will miss the Gilliams! They were beloved neighbors. 

 By now, Trav was doing his own, final walk through to make sure everything was turned off and we hadn't forgotten anything. Our car was parked out front, and I was leaning against the passenger door, just taking in the last scene of our house... and crying... of course. 

Then, a family in our ward, the Stotts, from up the street, drove by and saw me. The wife, Annalucia, hopped right out and with tears in her eyes, ran over to give me a hug. They had known we'd be leaving today and since they were driving nearby, thought they'd drive by our place to see if we were still there. She was so sweet!! I love her Brazilian accent and as she talked a million words a minute about how much they'll miss us, I was just so touched! Such a sweet family!! 

After they drove away, I was still gazing at our house when I broke down and exclaimed, "How do we leave our house?!" 

 And Trav half joked, "We drive away."

Then he scooted me into the car.

I still couldn't tear my eyes away as we pulled out, waving to the Gilliams. I had this desperate feeling that we were abandoning our house! I mean, how can we just drive away? This is our home!! This is our life!And it's not like we were moving from Gilbert to Mesa. We'll never see our house again. Or at least not for 20 years. We don't get the luxury of just driving by when we feel like it, to see how it's doing. I felt like I was leaving a member of my family! I know that sounds melodramatic, but it's exactly how I felt. It was a terrible feeling. I LOVED our house. I never knew you could love four brick walls so much. 

I couldn't imagine never driving up that cracked, driveway again. Never seeing a squirrel or rabbit scamper away behind our garage as we pulled in. Never walking up those stairs or mopping that floor. Never loading the kids in the stroller to walk up the street to Dairy Queen. 

No more jogs up and down Woodridge, Huxley, and Oehman. No more quick runs to the neighborhood Tops. No more mornings spent playing at the Family Room. No more time on the Harlem Community Center jungle gym. This is all Collin and Weston know. 

That maple tree is Collin's climbing tree. His friends live here. The Wegman's Kid's Club is what he gets to look forward to. As hard as this was on me, it was multiplied a hundred times over when thinking that I was completely changing my kids' lives. I know they're young and will adjust fine, but it was still a responsibility I felt. I was as heartbroken as I think I've ever felt. 

And the farther we drove away, the tears kept falling and the thoughts kept coming... the last time I pull onto the I-90, the last time I see the Galleria mall....


As the sun started to set and we left Buffalo completely, I couldn't help but feel that it was setting on a unique time of our lives. A season that will never be repeated. A special time we had to grow and make memories on our own. What an experience. What a journey. My heart was broken, and I was leaving a part of it behind me. Buffalo was good to us. I will never think otherwise. Thank you, 274 Mapleview Rd, Buffalo ward, dental school, Cheektowaga, and friends..... 

for everything.